When a pastor leaves a church, it is always difficult for both the congregation and the pastor. Often it can be a time of confusion, grief, and even anger. In this blog entry, I would like to look at this issue from the pastoral viewpoint. In a future blog, I will look at it from the congregational viewpoint. Feel free to respond via e-mail or in one of the social network sites on the “Contact Us” link.
It is important to make a distinction between a pastor leaving voluntarily or because he/she is forced to leave a church. How a pastor leaves will have a huge impact on how he/she reacts to the exit. If the exit is due to being forced to leave, often anger and bitterness can result toward the church or towards God. There may be often a feeling of relief that the “ordeal” is over. It is also important to distinguish that “force outs” can take place in different forms. Some pastors are forced out because of church conflict and turmoil which has its own set of dynamics of anger and bitterness. Other pastors are forced to leave because they are in a denomination where someone makes the decision for them-a bishop or a district official for the denomination. This takes place within denominations like the United Methodists who are appointed to pastoral positions and the decision is made by someone in authority rather than the congregation. This can cause a variety of reactions in the pastor including disappointment and anger toward the denominational hierarchy or great relief especially if the local church setting was not a pleasant one. In this case, the feeling may not be all unlike the feeling a pitcher gets in a baseball game when the manager comes to take him out of the game after giving up eight runs. The result may be a combination of anger and relief-anger that the game did not go as planned and relief that someone finally put an end to a night of having every pitch being hit out of the ballpark. Pastoral ministry can resemble that at times. Other pastors may be forced to leave due to health reasons or other personal reasons. No matter what shape the “force out” takes, a variety of issues face the pastor including anger, guilt, bitterness, relief or a sense of failure.
But what about the voluntary exit? This is one I can readily relate to. Things are going well at church. Generally speaking, conflict is held in check. The pastor has a good rapport with the people. Often a pastor in such situations has had many years in one church and has a number of close relationships. But in spite of a satisfying ministry, sometimes there is a call to a new church or a new ministry. In my case, I was at a point in life that it was time to pursue my long-time vision of being a church consultant. It wasn’t over being disappointed in what I was doing, but it was clearly in the Holy Spirit’s prompting for me to move in a different direction.
As I reflect on the different “phases” I went through in leaving voluntarily my pastorate of almost 19 years in my church, I can clearly see how God’s hand was on each phase. But in this blog, I thought it might be helpful to outline each phase of making the voluntary decision to leave.
The first phase, I would call the DECISION phase where the choice is actually made. Up until then, there may have been some soul searching as well as fact finding about the future. Once the decision is made to leave (which can happen months or even years before), steps are taken to begin the process of making the exit-resumes and profiles are sent out or, in my case, training and certification is pursued.
The second phase can best be described as the ANXIETY phase where all of the fears and questions race through one’s mind. For me, it was the struggle of how I would tell the congregation that I deeply loved (and I know who deeply loved me) that I was leaving. For me, to leave the church that I had pastored for nearly two decades was one of the most agonizing decisions I had ever made. What made the decision so agonizing was realizing how hard it would be to tell the congregation.
The third phase is called the RELIEF phase. After I told the leaders and the congregation that I was leaving, a huge burden was lifted off my shoulders. Since there were some things that needed to be taken care of before I made the announcement, it was becoming increasingly difficult to keep the upcoming announcement hidden from the congregation. But when I finally was able to spell it out to the congregation, there was a sense of relief.
The fourth phase was the GRIEVING phase. It was a time of many tears and the replaying of many memories. This phase can go well past the actual day that one leaves especially if it involves retirement or in the pursuit of a much different type of ministry or career. As I reflect back, my worst day of grieving was on the day after I had stepped down from my church. I realized that I was no longer a pastor and there was a certain emptiness in my mind and heart. However, this phase can often be intertwined with the fifth phase, the phase of JOY, GRATITUDE, and CELEBRATION. I actually experienced these phases simultaneously and it was not unusual to find myself oscillating back and forth from depression and sheer joy that I have much to be thankful for.
The final phase is what I call the RELEASE phase. It is the time where there is a peace that the church will survive and will move on and with God’s help, will do just fine. It is the phase where the pastor can let go of the ministry and give it to the hands of God. I found myself actually beginning this phase even before I preached my last sermon on the last day of my ministry in the church. During the last month of meetings, I realized that the concerns and the direction that each church board was dealing with was no longer my issue. I could release these concerns knowing that it was no longer on my shoulders and that God would raise up another leader to help guide the church. It is important to note that the “release” phase takes time and I find myself still in the process of working though this as I am barely a month past the date when I left my ministry to move in a new direction. Releasing 19 years of ministry is a slow process that cannot be unraveled in just a month and takes time to work through. Yet when a pastor is able to release his/her former church into the loving arms of the Savior, God is able to do a new work and the Kingdom is advanced for the glory of the Lord.
Thursday, May 30, 2013
Wednesday, May 29, 2013
A Biblical Basis for Considering Consultation for Your Church
Several Biblical models serve as a foundation when I reflect on my philosophy of what it means to be a church consultant. The first model that is foundational to my understanding of church consulting can be found in Exodus 18:13-26. In this passage, Moses is acting as judge from morning until evening and is carrying a heavy load. Jethro, Moses’ father-in-law consults with Moses and tells him that what he is doing is not good and that he cannot possibly continue to listen to all of the issues facing God’s people alone. Furthermore, since Moses’ caseload is time consuming, much time was being wasted as people waited in line for their turn. Jethro instructs Moses to select capable men to share the load and he tells Moses to hear the difficult cases while his leaders can act as judge over groups of “hundreds, fifties, and tens.”
This Biblical account outlines what I consider to be the first principle of what I see as essential in church consulting. I call this the principle of “Burden Sharing.” Today many pastors and church leaders are carrying a heavy load. Because they are carrying such a burden, it is hard for them to see the “forest through the trees” and can easily get bogged down in the every day affairs of the church. Far too often, it is hard for churches to have a clear vision of what God wants to do. I find this especially true in small struggling churches in which the pastor and far too few leaders are carrying the entire load. As a consultant, I believe one of my tasks is to help a church to have a fresh look at their ministry and to assist them as I can use my specialty to do some of the exploratory work of helping a church realize God’s purposes for them. Many times, church leaders simply do not have the time to do the work necessary to map out a strategy of ministry to their community. However as a consultant, I can lighten the load by doing that aspect of the work while helping the leaders find ways to ease the load.
The second model of church consulting found in Scripture can be found in Numbers 13 where Moses sent out a team of people to explore the land of Canaan. In Numbers 13:18-20 a number of questions and issues were raised. “What are the people like?” “What kind of land do they live in?” “Is it good or bad?” “What kind of towns do they live in?” “Are they unwalled or fortified?” “How is the soil?” These were just a few of the questions that were raised and the task of these explorers was go into the land and to come back with a report.
This Biblical account outlines the second principle of church consulting which I call the principle of “Fact Finding.” It is important to see that, even though God had promised them a “land flowing with milk and honey,” this did not negate the need to do the exploratory research of the land that God promised to the Israelites. Likewise God’s command for us to make disciples comes with a promise in Matthew 28 that He would be with us. In Acts 1:8, God emphatically says that we will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes upon us and we will be witnesses in Jerusalem and to the ends of the world. This is not only a command but also a promise. As a consultant, my task is similar to those who explored the promise-to look at the layout of the land where God has called the church to be witnesses and to help it see the challenges and opportunities to live out God’s promises. It is also important to see that after the final report was given to the people (Numbers 13: 31-33), there was a negative reaction and the people rebelled against God. They were too afraid of going into the land and could only see the obstacles and not the promise. Nevertheless, Moses and Aaron focused on the promise (Numbers 14) in the midst of the conflict and in light of the facts. Likewise, the consultant’s role is not only to be a fact finder but also to reveal the facts in light of God’s promises regardless on how the church responds to the consultant’s findings. How the church responds to the consultant’s work will ultimately be up to that congregation in light of God’s Word.
The third principle of church consulting can be found in Isaiah 40:29-31 which promises that God will give strength to the weary for those who hope in the Lord. The passage concludes by saying, “They will soar on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint (Isaiah 40:31, NIV). I call this principle of church consulting the principle of “hope.”
When I get my consulting ministry up and running, I plan to call this ministry, 4T/I40. The 4T stands for “Transformation Through Transitional Times.” The I-40 stands for Isaiah 40 in which “they will soar on wings like eagles.” There is no question that we are living in a period of great transition. Churches are facing major changes especially here in the Northeast where many churches are becoming bi-vocational or are even closing its doors. We are seeing many congregations becoming older in age while many young people are not connecting with a church. Yet God has a plan. One of the primary tasks as I pursue a consulting ministry is to take the training and the years of ministry experience I have had and to provide the tools and training to help churches through these transitional times with the goal to see true transformation in the church and in its individual congregations. My dream for the church is that it will truly soar on wings like eagles and will have an impact in the 21st century. I especially want to be able to help the small church even in declining communities and in places where the church has grown weary. My dream is to help churches restore the hope that has been lost.
I am fully aware that this will be a difficult road for many churches. Humanly speaking, often I can only see the giants living in the land. But, if in some small way, I can have an impact for the kingdom of God by helping churches along this journey and to see hope restored because of God’s promises, then I will consider my role as a consultant as an important one as we head into the next century.
This Biblical account outlines what I consider to be the first principle of what I see as essential in church consulting. I call this the principle of “Burden Sharing.” Today many pastors and church leaders are carrying a heavy load. Because they are carrying such a burden, it is hard for them to see the “forest through the trees” and can easily get bogged down in the every day affairs of the church. Far too often, it is hard for churches to have a clear vision of what God wants to do. I find this especially true in small struggling churches in which the pastor and far too few leaders are carrying the entire load. As a consultant, I believe one of my tasks is to help a church to have a fresh look at their ministry and to assist them as I can use my specialty to do some of the exploratory work of helping a church realize God’s purposes for them. Many times, church leaders simply do not have the time to do the work necessary to map out a strategy of ministry to their community. However as a consultant, I can lighten the load by doing that aspect of the work while helping the leaders find ways to ease the load.
The second model of church consulting found in Scripture can be found in Numbers 13 where Moses sent out a team of people to explore the land of Canaan. In Numbers 13:18-20 a number of questions and issues were raised. “What are the people like?” “What kind of land do they live in?” “Is it good or bad?” “What kind of towns do they live in?” “Are they unwalled or fortified?” “How is the soil?” These were just a few of the questions that were raised and the task of these explorers was go into the land and to come back with a report.
This Biblical account outlines the second principle of church consulting which I call the principle of “Fact Finding.” It is important to see that, even though God had promised them a “land flowing with milk and honey,” this did not negate the need to do the exploratory research of the land that God promised to the Israelites. Likewise God’s command for us to make disciples comes with a promise in Matthew 28 that He would be with us. In Acts 1:8, God emphatically says that we will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes upon us and we will be witnesses in Jerusalem and to the ends of the world. This is not only a command but also a promise. As a consultant, my task is similar to those who explored the promise-to look at the layout of the land where God has called the church to be witnesses and to help it see the challenges and opportunities to live out God’s promises. It is also important to see that after the final report was given to the people (Numbers 13: 31-33), there was a negative reaction and the people rebelled against God. They were too afraid of going into the land and could only see the obstacles and not the promise. Nevertheless, Moses and Aaron focused on the promise (Numbers 14) in the midst of the conflict and in light of the facts. Likewise, the consultant’s role is not only to be a fact finder but also to reveal the facts in light of God’s promises regardless on how the church responds to the consultant’s findings. How the church responds to the consultant’s work will ultimately be up to that congregation in light of God’s Word.
The third principle of church consulting can be found in Isaiah 40:29-31 which promises that God will give strength to the weary for those who hope in the Lord. The passage concludes by saying, “They will soar on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint (Isaiah 40:31, NIV). I call this principle of church consulting the principle of “hope.”
When I get my consulting ministry up and running, I plan to call this ministry, 4T/I40. The 4T stands for “Transformation Through Transitional Times.” The I-40 stands for Isaiah 40 in which “they will soar on wings like eagles.” There is no question that we are living in a period of great transition. Churches are facing major changes especially here in the Northeast where many churches are becoming bi-vocational or are even closing its doors. We are seeing many congregations becoming older in age while many young people are not connecting with a church. Yet God has a plan. One of the primary tasks as I pursue a consulting ministry is to take the training and the years of ministry experience I have had and to provide the tools and training to help churches through these transitional times with the goal to see true transformation in the church and in its individual congregations. My dream for the church is that it will truly soar on wings like eagles and will have an impact in the 21st century. I especially want to be able to help the small church even in declining communities and in places where the church has grown weary. My dream is to help churches restore the hope that has been lost.
I am fully aware that this will be a difficult road for many churches. Humanly speaking, often I can only see the giants living in the land. But, if in some small way, I can have an impact for the kingdom of God by helping churches along this journey and to see hope restored because of God’s promises, then I will consider my role as a consultant as an important one as we head into the next century.
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